Michael Korda suggests Success on any major scale requires you to accept responsibility… In the final analysis, the one quality that all successful people have… is the ability to take on responsibility
Being a great coach is taking responsibility for ourselves as well as allowing our clients to take responsibility with regard to what they would like to realize. Coaches don’t have superhuman powers and definitely do not have the solutions to their clients’ dilemmas, but great coaches do have authentic power by means of their expertise to aid others – and with it, the responsibility – to guide individuals in the direction of their results. This is True power can be tapped into to help REAL individuals in the real world. Whenever we as coaches make use of this power responsibly we can support our clients create positive, lasting change in their lives.
Consequently, with this power to coach our clients in the direction of realising their personal and/or business goals and becoming more as individuals, comes responsibility. Great coaches assume all of them as part of the professional responsibility. Including everything from listening with intent, building trust, working with the clients’ agenda and keeping our personal agenda out of the process, giving feedback when required, believing in our clients’ potential, trusting our clients to find their own answers and always keeping them accountable, assisting them to celebrate every little win and always being present for them.
Here are a few things we could do to become more responsible coaches.
How to develop the more Responsible “You” in Yourself and your Clients
#1 – Increase your self-awareness.
Learn and acknowledge your own strengths and weaknesses to be able to view your own behaviour objectively and understand what you value. Acknowledge your own shortcomings, ask for feed-back, and make changes when required. The more self-aware you grow to be of all your characteristics, the more grounded you will become. As you become more grounded you will trust your own intuition more and so you will become more efficient as a coach.
Dr. Gerard Bell, business consultant and professor at the University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill, advises us on how to develop our self-knowledge. He said, “Study yourself closely and practice self-assessment techniques to learn how you behave, and the effects you have on others. Ask others for their option, feedback, and suggestions to become a better coach.”
The wisdom is simple: the more we develop ourselves, the more we are able to offer, and the more we are able to assist others.
“Work harder on yourself than you do on your business.”
Jim Rohn
#2: Separate Your own Responsibility from your clients’ responsibility
Whenever we hear the word “responsibility”, we often believe that this needs to rest totally upon our shoulders. Within a coaching relationship this could not be further from the truth. As coaches we have a responsibility to our clients’ for being genuine, to have their best interests at heart and to enable them to achieve their objectives on their own terms and the greatest gift we are able to give would be to let them assume responsibilty for their own choices, their own journey and their own success.
Carrying the responsibility of coaching shouldn’t intimidate you. The ability to help others is what coaching is all about. Embrace the responsibilities that come with it and release the responsibilities that are not yours to take.
Nothing is accomplished by stressing about whether your clients realize their desired goals or not. Center on encouraging and inspiring them. Be their partner in their growth and on their journey. Brainstorm with them when it is called for, be their champion, pick them up when they fall. But ultimately, it is their own responsibility to assume responsibility for achieving their desired goals. You simply help them see and accomplish this state.
#3: Take Calculated Risks and Learn from Your Mistakes
Albert Einstein said “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. “ Doing things in a different way can be be extremely tough and we need to encourage our clients to take the potential risks even if they might fail. A willingness to risk failure is a core attribute of all successful people. As coaches we need to go ahead and take risks too and ask the hard questions.
Also, lead them to a more rewarding paradigm regarding failure. What is failure besides great feedback that our ongoing course of action is not the correct path? Use this information for course correction. Failure does not happen until we throw in the towel.If we don’t quit, then failure isn’t an option.
#4: Own and admit our mistakes
We live in a society where mistakes are not tolerated; this is a big shame because the greatest lessons and development come through our mistakes and failures. Everyone makes mistakes and makes the wrong choices from time to time; it is part of life. As coaches we make mistakes too and that’s OK provided that we learn from them and never make the identical mistake twice. A trainer on a coaching course I attended “gave” us each a “mistake bank account” with a credit of five thousand slips and what he said was take advantage of this account and make the mistakes, just don’t make the same one a second time. What an amazing gift he gave us and what an awesome gift we are able to give our clients when we help them understand this, help them to draw the necessary lessons and take corrective action from these mistakes, instead of allowing them to beat themselves up.
Not only does owning our mistakes and failures help us to be more honest and powerful in our own lives. Owning and assuming responsibility for them lets others see the integrity and virtue within us, and hence further gain their respect.